I have been wandering, exploring the various planes of existence, both high and low. I am adrift in three-dimensional space, searching for a (swing) path that will ultimately lead me home.
It is lonely and desolate out here in space. Carding 18-hole scores is something from a past life. Now, I am an apparition drifting from abstract theory to abstract theory, no golf course to call home.
Recently I got a text from the real world. It was my friend Arnold asking me to play some pre-holiday golf. I said no at first, because I am in the middle of trying to change my perception of the golf swing and probably would represent a hazard to others on a golf course. But he begged and pleaded, so I caved.
He promised it would be a fun round at Patriot Hills in Rockland County, about forty-five minutes up the Hudson River. Maybe it's a good thing he didn't mention the course's 136 slope, or that I didn't bother looking at a scorecard before coming to the course. Otherwise, I probably would've been spooked and not shown up.
The first hole had trouble written all over it. Yep, just the kind of hole you'd expect on a 136 slope course. What am I doing here again? Sure enough I hit a big block out into nothing. Reloaded and popped one up short of the fairway and went on to make a quick quadruple bogey. One of those eight strokes was a well-struck 5-iron, so I won't throw my bag into the gorge just yet.
Lost a second ball here, but overall the damage is not too bad. I am actually having an okay time.
The fauna here seems very comfortable with the presence of humans. This course must be a mostly douche-free zone.
This is some sort of shelter, but from what I am not sure.
Tell you what, things would have to get pretty bad outside to make going in there seem like a good idea.
What do you know, I managed to hang on to my balls for the most part, break 90 and even beat Arnold, who's played here before. Not bad for a guy without a golf swing. I even made a couple of birdies.
Arnold was right. It's a fun course with a lot of interesting, scenic looks off the tee. The pace of play was just right. Far as golf courses go, Patriot Hills is alright. Playing a round was a nice diversion, but I guess I should be getting back to the void to continue searching for my swing.